Friday Funday: The Most Ridiculous Leggings Ever Made

Okay, let's walk through a thought experiment:

Picture the most ridiculous leggings you can possibly imagine.  Now make them a million times more ridiculous.

Got it?  Got that mental picture, friends?

I'm about to blow away your wildest imagination.

Ready?

Okay:

Available here (affiliate link).  They were $18 the other week (when I bought them, because I do ridiculous things sometimes and have a huge weakness when it comes to the ugliest items imaginable, see e.g. here), so keep an eye on that price as hopefully they will drop again.  I also found them here for $20 (not an affiliate link).

Let me break this down for you:  There is a bucking unicorn on one side. There is a robot T-rex on the other side, and he is shooting laser beams from his head.  All of this is happening on a backdrop of rainbows and galaxies.

If this is not the height of "IDGAF" then I don't know what is.  I saw some girl wearing these at a dance party the other week and she was crushing the whole scene.

So, I just thought you all needed to know that this exists.

(Out of curiousity, when I asked you to picture the most insane leggings you could imagine, what did you picture?)

Have a great weekend!

A few nice things to start your Monday

1. Check out this cute little fox cookie jar I found at Target!

 

 

2. I went on a hike this weekend! We went to Bull Run, which is about an hour outside of DC in a town called Haymarket, Virginia. The hike was about two hours total, so not too long, but long enough to work up a good appetite for brunch!

 

Hiking OOTD. I am such a newb. Also I was wearing Kate Spade earrings because see also, newb.

 

3. My second round of foster kittens were adopted this weekend! They were pretty much the perfect cats and I was so sad to see them go...

 

KITTY SPOON, PEOPLE.

 

4. A woman at BJ's Wholesale Club almost beaned me in the head with a 20-pack of ramen noodles! My crime? I nicely asked the lady behind me to allow me to put my purchases on the conveyer belt before she did, a request that seemed necessary since she bypassed me and started loading up her own stuff on all available space. Drama be following me around lately, apparently.

 

How was your weekend?

 

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Shopping Fail (AKA, The Hidden Costs of Car Ownership)

This weekend, at Target:

This weekend, at BJ's Wholesale Club:

However, I did manage to use my super free stuff-detecting skills to get a free $40 bottle of car wax and a free $25 restaurant.com gift certificate.

What can I say?  I am a savings ninja.  Except for the part where I apparently buy approximately 20 times more than what I actually need on any given shopping trip.

Damn it, Anthropologie.

1.  I don't drink much tea.
2.  I don't drink tea out of pots.
3.  I have never felt the desire to have a teapot.
4.  I still bought this because EFF, it's cute.  And maybe now I will host tea parties?

I feel like this is the very definition of an "aspirational brand."

Witness my Food Shame

This soup is called "Cheeseburger Cheeseburger." Two cheeseburgers.

 

It consists of: a thick cheese base; small chunks of ground meat; small slices of onion.

And that's it. It's like eating macaroni and cheese, but without the macaroni and with small Progresso soup-sized globules of probably-beef.

 

The guys at Devon and Blakely actually laughed at me when I ordered it for lunch yesterday. Which, for the record, I don't do often but sometimes it just feels so wrong that it's right.

 

While we're on the subject, I also microwaved leftover weekend pancakes in the work break room this week. On three separate occasions.

 

I'm sorry, but only because I know I should be.

 

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Either the most amazing or the most terrible thrifting purchase

I love thrifting. Sometimes you find items whose value is immediately apparent. A Hermes blazer. A See By Chloe minidress.

Other times, well...

I COULDN'T HELP IT. It's just so...so...acid-washed!

AND FROM THE SIDE!

AND THE LINING!

Come ON, people, what was I supposed to do? NOT buy it? Scoff!

Come autumn, this will either be the best or the worst thrift purchase ever. But either way...

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Can we just LOL over this for a minute?

I need some adult suits (embarrassing biglaw associate admission:  all of mine are polyester and cost less than $200), so I've been browsing the suiting sections of various online retailers to get an idea for my options.

I stumbled upon this gem in Nordstrom's, "Boardroom Attire" section:

And for a mere $1000, THIS LOOK CAN BE YOURS.  (yes, that's an affiliate link, but please don't buy this.) (purse and shoes not included.)

What is even happening here, Diane Von Furstenberg?  I am all about "reinterpret[ing] workwear," but this looks more like "reinterpreting hangover."  AMIRITE?  Who is wearing this in a boardroom??


....Although honestly it's growing on me a little.  Damn my love for pajama-like workwear.  (Still, clearly not buying it.)

Mother-Fracking #YOLO

THIS IS HAPPENING*, PEOPLE.

Speak now or forever hold your peace.

Note to Anthro:  this is why you need to have free shipping all the time.  I never would have tried this crazy nonsense if not for your recent free shipping promo.


*  Just maybe not happening at the office......I haven't quite figured out how to make a jumpsuit work for business casual?  This may be a bigger challenge than the maxi skirt.  (FYI, I tried black-blazering it to no avail.)

Harumph.

Does one outfit fail beget another?  If I am honest with myself, I wonder how many items in my current wardrobe are only mine because I needed an emergency back-up outfit after whatever I packed into my gym bag turned out to be a disaster, and those items happened to be sitting in my office after a recent online purchase.

I was debating whether to return this dress, but I guess I'm keeping it now. :-\

Hidden costs of exercise, ya'll.  Hidden costs.

FYI, this outfit does not work for the office if you swap out the heels for tall leather boots.  Just sayin, for your reference.  Doesn't work.  Does. not. work.

Adaptation Fail (a.k.a., That Time I Went to Work Looking Like a Ringmaster)

Every once in a while, I'll spot an outfit on someone in my Google reader that I not only love, but also think I can emulate. I'm usually pretty decent at adapting inspiration and making it work for my own closet. (See, e.g., Inspiring Interpretations.)

Usually.

Sometimes though, I fall flat on my face.

Take, for instance, this:

I know, okay? I KNOW. For reference, I was trying to do this:

(from Dash Dot Dotty, who is constantly at the forefront of young business comfortable*)

* What do we think of this as a term for outfits that are business casual but also fabulously comfortable?

It just looks so GOOD on her and so WRONG on me. This is a good lesson in the importance of cut and proportions.  In my defense though, I exercised in the morning, so I packed this outfit the night before and didn't think to try it on in advance. And surely a couple "off" outfits here and there is a small price to pay for increased physical fitness, right? RIGHT?

Fortunately, I received a new T-shirt from the Gap that same day, so I was able to fix the outfit a bit:

(Also I posed at a wilder angle.) (Also, this T-shirt is the greatest. So soft and drapes so nicely. I'm wearing a medium (my usual choice for baggy comfort at the Gap) but I think this runs big so I should have gone with a small. To the extent that such information helps you with sizing, there you go.)

And DOUBLE-fortunately, my informal meetings for the day were pushed back a day, so nobody had to witness this mess. (I KNOW, I KNOW.)

Anyway, whomp whomp.

(PSA:  I've had my eye on these cute earmuffs from Kate Spade for the last two months and now that they are $30 I am pouncing.  

They are wired with headphones!  I can't say whether there's a microphone on these for phone-talking, but I've been driven crazy this winter by trying to wedge my phone in between my ear and my earmuffs to talk, so at least with these all I have to do (at the least) is hold my phone in front of my face to talk.  I can't vouch for quality since I haven't received mine yet, but Kate Spade as a brand is generally pretty good about fixing problems or taking back defective items (even if they are final sale).)

[Edited to add:  I just used them recently, and they don't work!  Do not recommend.]

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Cut my Hair! (or don't. whatever.)

It's happened.

Once every year and a half or so, I am overtaken by one urge and one urge only:

Maybe not quite this extreme, but I just want to cut ALL TEH HAIRZ.

But I always chicken out of getting something super-short, a la:

And end up with an above-shoulders bob, like so:

So I decided to crowdsource my next haircut.  Let me know in the comments what you think I should do, and know this:  I hate spending time on my hair in the morning, I hate styling products, and my unmanaged hair currently looks like this:

Yes.  Please help.

A Weekend in (Old) Vegas

My boyfriend and I spent the weekend in one of our favorite U.S. vacation destinations:

You've heard me talk before about the charm of Atlantic City (see, e.g., here, here, here), so I hope you'll indulge me in a bit of Vegas chatter now! This weekend marked my fifth trip to Vegas. This time, we decided to do something a bit different and stay off the main strip in Downtown Las Vegas (aka "Old Vegas"). We had an AMAZING time! Here are a few highlights:


The Freemont Street Experience

Old Vegas is the area from whence Las Vegas originally sprung. Downtown is steeped in rich history and resembles the crazy neon playground many of us think of when we imagine Vegas. The casinos bordering the downtown strip are covered in neon light and flashing bulbs.

There are tons of fun happenings on Freemont street...

Free concerts...

Haunted house! (temporary) (freaky. Haunted houses scare the you-know-what out of me, so why do I keep going in them?)

Balls!

Every night between dusk and midnight, there is a laser light and music show on the overhang protecting Freemont Street (the main downtown strip).

One of the nice things about downtown Vegas is that all of the casinos (especially those on Freemont Street) are extremely close together. Although casinos on the new strip are next to each other, you often half to walk half a mile to get to the next door casino!

You can take your photo with "a million dollars" at Binion's (and they print it for you for free! You don't even need to give them your email address!)

The Heart Attack Grill

Okay, so we didn't actually eat here*, but this landmark of downtown Vegas is definitely a sight to behold. It is a monument to obesity in America, serving butterfat milkshakes, fries cooked in lard, and a "quadruple bypass burger" that contains four burger patties and up to twenty slices of bacon. If you finish one, the waitresses wheel you out of the restaurant in a wheelchair.

Did I mention that every customer gets put in a hospital gown upon entry? And that the waitresses are dressed in sexy nurse outfits?

The best (and simultaneously worst) part? If you are over 350 pounds (and weigh in on a public scale) you eat free.

No free burger for my boyfriend.

Ironically (and sadly) two people actually had real heart attacks in this restaurant a few months ago. In the first instance, the tourists inside thought it was a show and asked him to turn a bit while on the floor so they could get a better picture! (source)

* Hash House A Go Go


In case my claim that my boyfriend and I did not eat at Heart Attack Grill sounded superior, allow me to mention that we DID eat at Hash House A Go Go, which has a new location in The Plaza hotel in downtown Vegas.

Our breakfast looked like this:

Sage fried chicken eggs benedict (also featuring bacon, mashed potatoes, cheese, buttermilk biscuit, and chipotle cream). Thanks, watermelon. This plate must be healthy now! (source)

The Golden Nugget

We stayed at the Golden Nugget, which was perfectly nice and had an incredible pool!

OMG, that slide! Tragically I never even got to ride it; I saved it for the last night, but then there was a "biohazard" that closed the pool. Any guesses on the nature of the hazard? Poop in the pool?

While at the nugget, we sampled many of the restaurants at the casino (the italian place (Grotto) and The Grill...meh. Lillie's Asian cuisine and Vic and Anthony's steakhouse...DROOLSOGOOD). We also partook in a few poker tournaments. Although they had a very quick structure, we did pretty well in them. Amazingly, you can buy in an hour and a half late with a huge chipstack. I took first place in one small tournament and my boyfriend cashed in the same one.


The Mafia Museum

As you might imagine, the history of Las Vegas is steeped in the mafia. There's a very interesting museum downtown called the Mafia Museum. It gives you an interesting look at the role of the mob in America, and particularly in Las Vegas. Also, there are tons of fun photo opportunities!

I thought this quote was hilarious, spoken by a mafioso who suspected his house was bugged (and it was):

I live by these words with regards to the information I publish on the internet---nothing I wouldn't stand behind in person!

Pinball Hall of Fame

This destination was my boyfriend's idea and it was a HUGE hit. The pinball museum is a nonprofit that collects and restores pinball machines (some as new as this year, some fifty or sixty years old) and vintage arcade games. It doesn't cost anything to get in and all of the machines cost between a quarter and 75 cents to play.

Remember Paperboy? Does anyone remember the name of that tv show on Nikelodeon that allowed you to play in virtual reality inside paperboy?

I learned that I am HORRIBLE at pinball, but I had a lot of fun anyway. (hey, not my fault---I wasn't allowed to have video games as a kid!) Did you know that you can actually aim that metal ball so that it gets somewhere? Or that there are missions to accomplish in a lot of pinball games? Or that you can keep the ball in motion for longer than two minutes? I didn't!!

Me struggling with pinball. In case you couldn't tell from my in-the-mirror outfit photos, my boyfriend (while amazing at many things) is not a photographer.

The Outlets


Las Vegas is home to two outlet malls: one in the north, one in the south. I prefer the north outlets because they are open-air (the south outlets are in kind of a dingy mall). Plus, the north outlets have a Kate Spade! And it's only a mile from downtown Vegas!

Somehow I managed to escape Kate Spade with only two pairs of earrings (despite a 50% off everything sale AAAKCCKK purses). I did buy a few other things, though....budget, I promise I will be faithful to you after vacation!

Michael Kors iPad folio

Ah, Vegas, I only just left you and I already miss you! We will DEFINITELY stay in old Vegas again!

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