PART ONE: THE BANANA
1. Peel some bananas.
2. Cut them in half width-wise, so you have a top half of the banana and a bottom half. (Not a left half and a right half.)
3. Stick a popsicle stick (affiliate link; and FYI those are also the sticks I bought for myself) in the banana halves and arrange on a baking sheet covered in parchment paper so that the bananas are not touching each other.
4. Put the bananas on the cookie sheet in the freezer.
5. After about half an hour (or three hours, if you sit on the couch and forget about them while catching up on Grey's Anatomy), they will be "flash frozen" and you can stick them all in a ziplock bag without worrying that they will congeal together in a big lump of banana. Then let them freeze for several hours before you proceed to part two. [Incidentally, this flash freezing thing is a very nifty trick for anything homemade that you want to freeze in bulk. I do this with uncooked homemade french fries, muffin-tin omelets, etc.]
You end up with this. ^
PART TWO: THE SAUCE
1. Combine roughly equal parts of chocolate chips and coconut oil. You can eyeball it.
2. Melt in the microwave. For small amounts, I do 30 seconds on high; for large amounts I do a minute. Roughly. Better to undershoot than overshoot and burn the chocolate. It doesn't have to be perfectly melted when you take it out, since it will get smooth in Step #3.
3. Stir until smooth.
See, told you. Smooth.
4. Dip a banana in the chocolate mixture. Swirl around until evenly coated.
Or you can be awesome and leave a little uneven spot like a boss.
5. Feel free to dip again if you want an extra-thick chocolate layer.
6. The chocolate shell will harden within about 30 seconds. [FYI, yes, this is "magic shell," but it's homemade, cheap, and lacking in crazy preservatives and chemicals (as long as you use chocolate also lacking in crazy preservatives and chemicals).]
7. Enjoy while reclined on the couch, but try to be diligent about picking up wayward chocolate shards as they fall into your cleavage. Or don't, and make it a fun little game for later. Your call, honcho.